US officials are excited to learn that a highly advanced, futuristic poll is making its rounds online. The poll will reveal to users “what state they belong to.” Scientists are perplexed at how this advanced poll might work and be so accurate.

Quantum physics scientist Dr. Neal Tyson believes he has discovered the secrets of this powerfully accurate poll. “The poll uses string theory technology. When the polarities are reversed on the scalar function, it provides polymorphism to the user’s input”.

One man, who simply went by TheManAlgiers, (or as his friends put it ‘Them Anal Giers’) was so impressed by the results of his test that he moved to the state it told him he belonged to. “The quiz told me that I belong here, so I moved to Wyoming. The poll is powerful. My first day here, I got laid, this time with a woman. All Hail Powerful and Merciful Poll!”

Officials are cautioning users who take the test to prepared to “have their mind blown” and that it could “change their life.”