For the first time in his life, local resident Alonzo Johnson realized today that Black History Month is the shortest month of the year.

Alonzo stated “Well, I suppose this is just another incident where the white man has screwed us poor black folk over again. He could have given us any other month of the year, but no, whitey chose February – the shortest month of the year.”

“Even the Hispanics made off better than us blacks with Hispanic Heritage Month running from September 15th to October 15th. And don’t get me started on those greedy Jews taking the month of May with its one extra day for Jewish American Heritage Month!” proclaimed Johnson.

Johnson was last seen looking up other cultural celebrations and shaking his fist in disgust as he learned that both Asian Pacific American Heritage Month and Haitian Heritage Month both occurred in May, a 31 day month.